Everyone sees the 'e-cards' that are shared across social media, right? You know, the ones with the Victorian-age looking people and the sarcastic comments written across them? Well, while scrolling through my Facebook this week, someone had shared the e-card that had something to this effect: "Yeah, honey, I know it's hard cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry, but I also have this side-gig called a job." The person who had shared it took offense to it, as she is a stay-at-home mom (and rightfully so, it wasn't very polite), but her response was something to the effect of "I've done both. When you are at work you aren't disciplining, modeling, and shaping young minds. I KNOW which one is easier" and someone within a thread on this topic replies that she "totally agrees, it's hard to make sacrifices to be a SAHM, but that [she] understands that her kids are worth it" and add in the statement "I would like to go back to school, but my kids are too important."
First, this is NOT a slam at SAHMs. I will NOT argue who has it "harder." SAHMs have a huge job and responsibility, but I take REAL offense that because I am a working mom who also goes to school that I must not care about my kids enough or think that they are not important or that I place my kids on the back-burner in selfish ambition.
Why must everyone assume that someone can't be a good mom, a good student, and a good worker? Why must one thing HAVE to suffer? I really don't see it that way. I can be dedicated to my family, my job, and my schoolwork and give it all my best--NOTHING has to go to crap! So, why must people feel that they need to make me feel that it does? I just don't get it. Why can't we support each other? There are plenty of children who DO have crappy home lives, so why do we feel that we need to put another mom down in order to make ourselves feel better? Seriously?
Friday, November 30, 2012
Wednesday, November 28, 2012
Here we go...
Crazy title, right? "Good student...bad mother..." Are you thinking, "huh?"
Thought you might, so here is post #1, explaining what we are doing here. My name is Rikki, I live in Appalachia, have three children, work full-time as a teacher for students with special needs, adjunct at our local community and technical college...and...I'm a doctoral student.
No, M.D. won't follow my name, but Ed.D., a doctor of education. I enjoy being a student--I like the intellectual debates surrounding pressing issues of our educational systems, discussing different philosophies and theories about learning, and talking with others about best practices. But, being a doc student doesn't really mesh well with our Appalachian culture.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not surrounded by men in the the Ed.D. program, women are very well represented, but women with young children (namely, 7 yrs, 5 yrs, and 2 yrs)? Not so much. On a fairly routine basis, I am called out, either overtly or covertly about how I must not be a good mother if I am devoting so much time to the doc program. Those experiences bring me to this blog...
One characteristic of educational research is to take a problem and go at it. After being approached by a fellow classmate and a professor (who should introduce themselves somewhat soon), we decided that being a mom and a doc student in Appalachia would pose for a really interesting qualitative research project. The question then came, how would we record information? Well, in this technological age, blogging seemed like a good solution.
So here we go, embarking on this recorded journey of being a mom and a doc student (BTW, I have erased probably 50 characters of my son's typing and my daughter has been put back to bed about 5 times in the course of this first blog). This blog should be candid and straightforward, and we aren't quite sure what is going to develop from it. But, you are more than welcome to ride along with us! Feel free to comment and ask questions!
Thought you might, so here is post #1, explaining what we are doing here. My name is Rikki, I live in Appalachia, have three children, work full-time as a teacher for students with special needs, adjunct at our local community and technical college...and...I'm a doctoral student.
No, M.D. won't follow my name, but Ed.D., a doctor of education. I enjoy being a student--I like the intellectual debates surrounding pressing issues of our educational systems, discussing different philosophies and theories about learning, and talking with others about best practices. But, being a doc student doesn't really mesh well with our Appalachian culture.
Don't get me wrong, I'm not surrounded by men in the the Ed.D. program, women are very well represented, but women with young children (namely, 7 yrs, 5 yrs, and 2 yrs)? Not so much. On a fairly routine basis, I am called out, either overtly or covertly about how I must not be a good mother if I am devoting so much time to the doc program. Those experiences bring me to this blog...
One characteristic of educational research is to take a problem and go at it. After being approached by a fellow classmate and a professor (who should introduce themselves somewhat soon), we decided that being a mom and a doc student in Appalachia would pose for a really interesting qualitative research project. The question then came, how would we record information? Well, in this technological age, blogging seemed like a good solution.
So here we go, embarking on this recorded journey of being a mom and a doc student (BTW, I have erased probably 50 characters of my son's typing and my daughter has been put back to bed about 5 times in the course of this first blog). This blog should be candid and straightforward, and we aren't quite sure what is going to develop from it. But, you are more than welcome to ride along with us! Feel free to comment and ask questions!
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